Archive for life

Frozen on Alyeska & the Downfall of Onimusha

// February 13th, 2009 // No Comments » // Snowboarding, friends, life, travel, video games

A few weekends ago I flew up to Anchorage to visit my brother. I always enjoy visiting him because we have such a good relationship.

While there, we decided to go to Alyeska, both Saturday and Sunday for some snowboarding (Aaron skied). Saturday the weather was reasonable, although the mountain was pretty crowded. Sunday was a different story. Being that it was the Super Bowl and the fact that it made for a desolate and chilly day. Adria joined us on Sunday, so it was actually a family affair. The temp was right around 0F with windchills around -20F. To give you an idea of what snowboarding in this type of weather is like, imagine this: you have zero desire to stop on the mountain (for any reason), you can’t sit still on the lift because doing so you’d probably freeze solid (why Alyeska doesn’t have covered, a.k.a. bubble,  lifts baffles me), talking or taking pictures is pretty much out of the question (except in the lodge), and any amount of skin exposed is destined to become numb (and red). That was probably the coldest conditions I’ve ever snowboarded in, and I’d think twice about doing it again.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m really glad I got a chance to go boarding at Alyeska. According to Forbes, Alyeska is the 4th snowiest resort in the world. The snow was really nice, especially since it had snowed about a foot total in the days prior.

One thing that would make Alyeska infinitely better would be to upgrade their chair lifts. All of them should have a bubble and even better yet would be seat warmers. It’d also be nice if all lifts had the safety bar with foot rests so you can rest your board (or skis) as you ride up. The inside of my left leg was particularly sore from riding the lifts all day and having my board dangle below me. I guess that creates a lot more stress on your leg than you’d imagine.

The drive to Girdwood (where Alyeska is) is quite nice. The mountain is located near an inlet. On your way to Alyeska, you can see the water flowing in to the inlet. With all the snow & ice, doesn’t look like anything all that exciting. On the way home, most of the water has already flown out of the inlet, so you get huge chuunks of snow/ice mixed with mud that kinda l0oks like cracked earth in the desert, but on a much larger scale.

While on the mountain, we had a great view of the inlet and surrounding mountains. Because of terrain, clouds tend to hang low above the inlet around the peaks in the area. So I think technically when we were at Alyeska, we were above the clouds (and almost in the clouds on Sunday).

After getting in quite a bit of physical activity Saturday & Sunday, it was decided that we start playing video games, Onimusha: Warlords. Although it took almost all day, we were able to beat the entire game (with a little help from an online guide). That was a lot of fun, as I haven’t beaten a game from start to finish in quite some time.

I can’t imagine I’ll be going back to AK anytime soon, or ever for that matter. Aaron & Adria are moving back to MN in May, so the motivation to go back is pretty much gone.

For the record…

// January 16th, 2009 // No Comments » // friends, life

I know my last post was pretty blunt and a bit harsh, but I wanted to officially say that I’m not mad at her and I definitely don’t hate her. I just couldn’t continue with the relationship we had. We’ve since talked, and although I don’t expect us to be best friends or anything, I think we’ll keep in touch from time to time.

Looking down the barrel: ‘008

// January 13th, 2009 // No Comments » // friends, life

So it’s been awhile, but I am back. 2008 was a hard year for me, with only the very beginning of the year being truly happy times for me. The rest of the year I spent slowly spiraling down into a dark existence, hitting rock bottom right around the end of the year.

In the past year, I’ve lost most of my self confidence, been consciously depressed, including pissing off most of my friends who attempted to keep in contact with me, losing about 25 lbs, and finding out I’m anorexic. I spent the majority of my time trying to make someone love me the way I wanted, even though I realized a long time ago that that would never happen, and turned out to be a rather expensive endeavor, all for nothing. I kept turning to her out of complete and utter loneliness, only for her to turn a cold shoulder every time I needed her. (more…)

2008 California State Propositions

// November 6th, 2008 // No Comments » // life

So it seems Californians:

  1. want a high speed train (this sounds good, but i somehow imagine tickets will initially be so expensive that hardly anyone will use it, plus i can also imagine it will take forever for any of this to become a reality)
  2. don’t like confining farm animals (i can see the price of veal, pork, and eggs going up once this goes into effect)
  3. want to improve children’s hospitals (they’re our future, better make sure they’re healthy)
  4. don’t want to force minors to wait to get an abortion until 2 days after the Dr told their parents (the fact a minor is having a kid so young probably means they need more involvement from their parents, but the parents voted and said they don’t care if their kids have kids so young)
  5. think nonviolent drug possession criminals already have enough (if it went the other way, there’d be less potheads in state prison)
  6. think police & law enforcement don’t need more money (if it went the other way, bad criminals would stay in prison longer)
  7. don’t really care about switching over to renewable energy (this just benefited privately owned utilities companies, awesome)
  8. don’t want same sex marriages (so much that they’re gonna change the state constitution, which is even more awesome than #7)
  9. think victim safety should be consideration for bail or parole (once you’re in CA state prison, it’s gonna be harder to get out)
  10. don’t care about alternative fuel vehicles or renewable energy (this is in direct conflict with #1, especially since CA claims 50% of the top 10 smoggiest cities list)
  11. think the state needs to be re-districted (yeah, this seems real important, but i guess they do it every 10 years)
  12. think Cali veterans should get farm and home aid (will provide state-backed loans for veterans’ farm and home purchases)

I didn’t vote, so I can’t complain. But I did find it interesting on the things people believe in and how some of them are conflicting. What it comes down to is this, Californians care more about farm animals and the private lives of gays & lesbians than they do about underage abortions and forcing businesses to be a part of the energy/pollution crisis (vs deterring the crisis with something that is destined for failure).

CA State Propositions: http://www.smartvoter.org/2008/11/04/ca/state/prop/

The First Time

// October 29th, 2008 // No Comments » // life

I remember it like it was yesterday, it was two days before Valentine’s Day and we were sitting on my bed talking and laughing together. She was wearing her pink & white striped tank top, still one of my favorites to this day. Unexpectedly, three little words slipped from her mouth. It was clear she hadn’t planned to say that to me yet, but in that exact moment, I think her heart was so filled with love that she couldn’t contain it anymore, even if she had tried.

I was more than happy. I can’t even begin to describe how good I felt. It was the first time in my life that I truly felt bliss.

In all my life, it’s still the purest love I’ve ever felt. The way she told me those three little words forever changed my life. Since that moment, I knew that was a feeling I wanted to always have in my life.

On a related note, two days later on the international day lovers express their love for each other, she blew me away again. She showed me what Valentine’s Day is really about. That was the second time in my life that I felt bliss. It’s truly amazing how one person’s love can be so pure and amazing. I was truly lucky that I was on the receiving end both times.

365 Days of Missing

// October 24th, 2008 // No Comments » // life

Me, Mom, Aaron

Me, Mom, Aaron

On this 12th day of Cheshvan marks my mother’s yahrzeit. It’s difficult to fathom that’s it’s been a year since she passed. Sometimes it seems like I was just talking to her on the phone the other day, but most of the time it feels like an eternity. A day doesn’t go by that I don’t think of her. So many things I would have liked to ask her, from the smallest things, like where to find something obscure and specific in a grocery store (she always knew even better than the staff at the store) to random medical questions (yep, she was that good). I’m quite sure I could write a book filled only with the questions I would have normally asked her over the past year. In addition, I could easily write ten more volumes of new questions I want to know now that she’s gone.

The loss of my mother has really affected me. I’ve lost 25 lbs in the last year and although it’s nice to see my clearly defined 6-pack (vs the 4-pack + a small keg it was before), I know it’s not healthy. I’ve learned to cry again (maybe too much). I think I’ve cried more in the last year than I have in the previous 20 years. I’ve also learned to appreciate the details and express my feelings as such, since I know first hand you can lose anything in the blink of an eye.

I know most people have no idea what I’m feeling, even they think they do, unless they’ve experienced something similar. It’s sad that it took such a great loss to learn and realize everything that I have in the past year.

The last time I saw my mom conscious was September 23, 2007 when I was home for my 10-year high school reunion. The last time I heard my mom’s voice was October 21, 2007, but it was overheard when I was talking with my brother. The last time I actually spoke to her was a few days before that. I didn’t even get a chance to give her her birthday gift, which was a new iPod loaded with all her favorite music so she could listen to it while she was in the hospital. The last time I saw my mom alive was October 24, 2007, and that image is forever burned in my mind. I wish it wasn’t, as having seen her like that absolutely killed me. The last time I saw my mom was on that same day in the evening after she had passed. No words can explain what it’s like to see your mother’s dead body.

It’s very easy to blame the hospital for her loss, as they gave her incorrect medication for a headache that adversly reacted with some of the other medication she was taking causing an annurism in her brain. Leukemia unfortunately inflicted many health problems upon her, resulting in having to take many different medications. At least once before my mom had corrected the Dr about a conflicting medication he prescribed her because she thoroughly researched every medication and treatment she was or was about to receive and often knew more about them than the doctors themselves. It just goes to show that just because a Dr has a framed piece of paper on his/her wall, doesn’t mean shit and that doing your own research can pay off greatly.

Having just re-read what I wrote, I realize my thought process is all over the place, so I’m just gonna stop writing since I know I could keep rambling on about so many things ’til the end of time.

I miss my mom dearly. She was by far the best mom in the world. I’m sure everyone else has their own arguments as to why their mom is the best in the world. But that doesn’t matter, what matters is that you never forget what makes your mom so great. I love you mom. Your time came too soon…

53 Years Ago

// October 14th, 2008 // No Comments » // life

Fifty-three years ago today, Bernard & Leona Davidson gave birth to Marsha Hermione Davidson, my mother. I know exactly what I would give her, a big hug. I wish I had made more of an effort to hug my mom more. I wish had spent every year with my mom on her birthday.

The more your mind matures, the more you take for granted the things around you, things you depend on (both consciously & subconsciously), things you always think will be there. And because of that, you tend to forget to show your appreciation for the things that deserve the most appreciation.

About 2 years ago when my mom was diagnosed with Leukemia, in a blink of an eye I realized how little appreciation I showed her and began expressing myself and my feelings, especially to her but also in other areas in my life. She took care of me, supported me, and most importantly, she loved me completely and accepted me without ever having to think about it. She did that my entire life (more than half of her own life), and I’m forever indebted to her for that. The last year of her life is when she needed me the most. I did my best to support her and show her my love and appreciation. I know it helped her a lot, but I wish I would have given her more.

If I could be with her now, I’d give up everything to do so, just to hug her and tell her I love her one last time.

Miss & love you mom…

Hofbräuhaus Las Vegas

// September 13th, 2008 // No Comments » // friends, life, travel

Hofbräuhaus Las Vegas

Hofbräuhaus

On the last day of August, I flew to Vegas for the day to go to my friend Svihla’s wedding. Svihla and I worked together in Germany. I’ve always really enjoyed going out for drinks with him and his stammtisch group. This year, Svihla brought his wife-to-be over to get married in Vegas. The ceremony was short, sweet, and performed by a German woman who worked at that chapel. He has requested that I wear my lederhosen as he and his wife would also be wearing tracht. Although I love wearing my lederhosen, this posed somewhat of a situation. As I was onlly going for the day it would have been easiest just to wear lederhosen the entire time, but obviously everyone will stare. I ended up wearing jeans to Vegas with my lederhosen in a small bag. I changed just before the wedding and ended up wearing my lederhosen home on the plane. (more…)

Flash Drive

// September 11th, 2008 // No Comments » // life, technology

SanDisk & Kingston Flash Drives

SanDisk & Kingston Flash Drives

It’s funny how geeky and “connected” I am, yet I have never been one to use a flash drive. I’ve had one a couple times in my life, but I never really used them and ended up leaving them somewhere, never to be used again. Surprisingly, a few months ago a woman emailed me and said she had my flash drive. She said my resume was on there, but the woman found it in DC and I haven’t lived there in 8 years. Really strange. Anyway, so my father gave me a flash drive for my birthday this year. It arrived in the mail the other day and I’ve already started using it. It’s a SanDisk Ultra® Cruzer® Titanium 8GB (yes, they really have 2 ®s in the product name).
Yesterday, my colleague found an extra flash drive in one of the storage cabinets and gave it to me. It’s a Kingston DataTraveler® Secure 2GB. It’s funny how you can go from none to two in a matter of days.

Waves

// September 11th, 2008 // No Comments » // life

Hermosa Beach sunset

I’ve been sitting on my stoop in the evenings the last couple nights to relax. What I’ve noticed is, if you ignore the crickets and the slight buzz from the ocean air hitting the nearby power lines, you can hear the waves crashing on the beach. Pretty nice, especially considering it’s about a 5-minute walk down to the beach and there are several rows of houses/buildings between my place and the beach, not to mention the cement fence separating the sand from the walking/bike path.